!!!!NO MORE SCHOOL FOR FOUR MONTHS!!!!

I think i failed my physics test this morning, like literally failed. I hope i had a high enough lecture mark to pass the course cuz i really really don't want to take it again.

I'm so excited to be done. I'm going to go out searching for a second job this weekend. I need to make money this summer. Its exciting, a new job, new people, new stuff to do.

Went to the mall with rach and nikki this afternoon. We just wandered around didn't really buy anything. Vistited steph and lindsey at work. Lindsey was going on her break, so we spent an hour with her, it was fun we had lunch and wandered some more.

We're all going to see mean girls at a screening tonight which should be fun, i really really want to see that movie.

Its so nice not having to worry about school theres a whole bunch of crap i've needed to get done these last couple weeks and i just havn't been able to because of school, this is my nice to do list for the next week or so:

1. Clean my room
2. Do something with all of my school stuff
3. Update resume
4. Find a job
5. Open another bank account
6. Find something to invest money in or get some GIC's for my saving account.
7. Figure out how much money i owe my parents and pay them back so i'm debt free
8. Figure out what is going on with the LA trip

I can't do it
I've tried to study, my mind wanders, i'll read the same sentence over and over and then realize that i have no idea what i just read. I can't focus. I tried reading the textbook, but i fell asleep.

Part of me just wants to say screw it, its my last final, i'll just not study for it and see how it goes. Its so tempting, but i hate failing at anything.

And its not like i'm going to study tonight while the hockey game is on, so i'm basically screwed, unless someone wants to trade me their brain (preferably someone whose good at physics), it'd be a pretty good deal, they'd get a crazy look at my boring life. Or more realisitically, someone could hit me with a bus, anyone own a bus? maybe just run over my foot, dont break it though, maybe sprain?...wait i can still write a test with a bum foot, hmm concussion? not a big one, maybe just a bump on the head, enough to get a doctors note....

haha i wonder if psychotic people out there actually do crazy stuff like that just to get out of exams, its seriously not that big of a deal, im just frusterated with my own lack of motivation.

I changed the template, but its not working for me, it just doesn't click, can't find one i like.....

Yesterday was the longest day, i should have studied more for my math test but oh well.

Work was actually pretty fun yesterday, lots of good people were working so it went by pretty fast.

Last exam tomorrow, yay for physics!! haha last physics course i ever have to take.

This year has been really really weird. It feels like the whole year took place in 2 months. I didn't see that many people throughout the year, compared to last year. Last year we saw everybody ever single weekday, and most of the weekend with work/screenings. We saw the band people at least once a week, now i'm lucky if i see them once a month. This year everyone has gone their seperate ways, we all have jobs, school, totally different schedules, so different from last year, where we always knew we could find someone and hang out in the art room.
We've all changed so much, but its weird because when we're together we're just as good of friends as we were last year even if we only see each other once a week. Now we actually have to make an effort to do something if we want to see our friends unlike last year where we saw everyone at school.
I'm just hoping this summer will be as much fun as last summer, that we'll all hang out more and stuff will start to be normal again.

So its 7 in the morning...early you say? not quite, i've been up since 4 this morning, yes thats right 4AM. I am the queen of procrastination. I technically did not start stuyding for my linear algebra exam until this morning, my exam is at 9AM. I had ALL of yesterday to study but did i, no. I worked out in the morning, watched some TV, suntanned out on the deck with my books (at least i attempted), went to macs and got icecream, watched some more TV, went to the lake to watch the guys pracitce with lindsey, came home went out for dinner with the parents, watched the game (an AMAZING game, we looked like an entirely different team then the one that played in detroit.) And then i went to sleep...so now i'm totally cramming

I'm already in summer mode (too bad its snowing), i just keep on thinking of next week, when i'll have nothing to do but work and have fun. Its bad cuz i just forget about everything else is going on this week.
I'm so excited for red deer!! its going to be awesome, just like old times, haha yeah we're losers but oh well.

oh yeah i'm not working friday night, and till 10 on saturday night so we should get some people together and go out this weekend!

Yay for self tanner!!
I'm not going to deny it, say i went some place warm, or fake and bake. This is the first succesfful, not too streaky time that it actually looks real, the rest of the time it was a disaster.
See the eye doctor discovered when i was little that i have no pigment in my eyes, he showed me two picture of a normal eye and my eye, you can see right through mine, while a normal eye is cloudy.
So the theory is that this carries over to my skin, i tried faking baking didn't work, i'd end up getting burnt, and then going back to pale, so its almost physcially impossible for me to tan.

I watched the best movie yesterday, "three to tango" its an old one from matthew perry and neve campell, it was so cute!

I think i'm going shopping today which is exciting cuz it means new summer clothes!

Yay 4 down 2 to go!!
Studied literally all day yesterday for bio, and i aced it, i didn't go to bed till 2 this morning and got up a 6:30 to study some more, but i know that i got over 87%on it!!!
Went to the mall picked up some chinese food, now i'm going to get into my pjs watch a movie, take a nap, and then start studying for algebra....

Went to the back alley last night, i shoulda just went home after work, i was way to tired and sick, oh well, next weekend will be a good weekend to party it up.
I raked the whole entire lawn yesterday morning, we live on a corner lot so thats a lot of grass, my back is so sore this morning. I write bio tomorrow, i'm totally not ready for it yet, and once again i'm procrastinating

Wow a whole day without blogging, i dont' know how i restrained myself.
Yesterday was supposed to be a productive stuyding for chem day, and it proved to be everything but that. Instead:
I worked out
Had some breakfast
Showered
Did my hair
Did some laundry
Studided for about 30 minutes
Got ready to go out for lunch with dan, lindsey and sabrina
Went to whitespot, had to put up with the angry glares from random people who saw dan's detriot jersey (but we won!!)
Went back to lindsey's house to look up flights and hotels for our LA trip
Came home and watched Oprah/Dr.Phil
Went to a meeting at work
Went to the library for 30 minutes to attempt to study, but curiousity about the hockey game got the best of me, so i went home.
Watched the hockey game
Had some dinner
Then around 9:30 i pulled out the books and started to study.
I lasted until around 11:00ish, got bored and decided to go to sleep.
But I did wake up at 5 AM this morning and got in 3.5 solid hours of studying

We were allowed a cheat sheet for the chem exam, one 8x11 piece of paper double sideded, you should have seen mine it was a work of art. It helped so much, i had most of the important stuff. I still think i failed the multiple choice portion. Paritially because i left it to last and only had 30 minutes to finish it, but it was some tough stuff. I havn't stayed till the end of an exam for a long time, but only about 10 out of 50 people left before the 3 hours were up.

but...I have an A- going into my bio final which is absolutly amazing...i'd be at an A+ if it wasn't for my lab mark, i was at a 97.6 in my lecture, but only a 68 in my lab, stupid labs, they're so boring so i just didnt' put the effort into them.

My little brother is soo cute, about 5 days ago he had me help him make up some posters, one that says Honk for Flames, and the other one says Go Flames Go. Every day he's gone out and stood on the corner by macs with his friends and all the cars are going crazy, it's so cool the spirit everyone has now. Except for one jerk who lives next door to the road, he yelled at them today and threatened to call the cops.

I feel bad, i'm such a selfish person. My cousins uncle died yesterday so their family is going up to Kelowna with my dad on thursday for the funeral. Our other cousin and his mom are coming to calgary for a vollyball tournament and were supposed to be staying with them and now since they're leaving they have to stay at our house, which means i'm kicked out of my room during final week.
My room which is like my study central place, it has my desk with my computer, which has all my notes on it, my bulletin board that has all my formuals for anything that i need, my crazy picture wall that is more interesting to stare at then just a blank one, my secret stash of junk food, my strereo and all of my cd's. I can't be convinced to study upstairs at the kitchen table it's just not possible.

Noooo I'm getting sick i can feel the cold setting in, i've been trying to fight it with a multitude of vitamins, but the sore throat is getting worse and i can feel my glands swelling up.

First exam is in 4.5 hours, english...i'm so glad i went to the library yesterday, i ran into rowelyn and lana, which was a lifesaver. I lost my bio notebook about a month ago, so i was able to photocoy all of the notes that i lost, and i found out that my chem midterm is on friday, i was positive that it was on monday, and that bio was on friday, that would have been just my luck showing up preparted for the wrong test.

WE ROCK!! THE FLAMES ARE AMAZING!!!

Went to the Bull and Finch in Bridlewood last night, it was the only place we could get a table at. It was sooo much fun, i think i did something to my voice on that last goal, my throat is so sore this morning, but wow what an amazing game!!!

Did no stuyding yesterday at all, feel kinda guilty now, but i'll make up for it today.

Sounds like the LA trip is a go, it'll be fun, hopefully i can go

Anyone want to find Tara a second job????

So i think i've kinda decided what i want to do when i grow up, be an optometrist. I've always wanted to be a doctor, but i don't really want to have the crazy, always on the run lifestyle of emergency/hospital doctors, and a general practioner has no appeal to me at all. I kinda wanted to have my own buisness and with optometry i could do that. Plus it isn't a program where you need to have a full degree to enter the program, they just have 19 required prerequistes. I already have 8 of them, if i take a summer/spring course i could take the other 10 next year, and i could apply for my third year. I'd have to move to ontario, the only english optometry school is at the university of waterloo. Its going to be crazy expensive though
For the whole 4 years its:
- 31100 for tuition
- 8450 for equipment
- 3946 for textbooks
- around 22,000 for res/food

for a ground total of $65,496, haha we'll see if it happens, they only take 60 students a year so i guess i should start studying...

ughh eating a whole choclate bunny in one day is not the best idea...

So dissapointed that we lost last night, but it was a good game, oh well this just means we have to beat them in vancouver

Everyone was at the movies last night it was crazy:
Kendall and her friends
Alex and Trish
cam
about 5 of the people i used to work with at FS
erin and morgan
plus the usual groupies who have no life and come in everyday.

Had a mini hockey party with the relatives on thursday, lots of good food, wings, nachos, the usual, was a good game kipper is amazing, plus he's cute with that little red beard. Hopefully people are going to a pub tongiht to watch the game, and i can meet up with them after work (i'm off at 10), i know there were rumours of it, so let me know if anythings going down.

I've skipped school so much this last week its awesome, my alarm will go off, i'll think about getting up, roll over for "2 more minutes" and wake up 2 hours later, oh well one more day and i'm done!

Last night was fun, i'm so glad i went, super tired now, but i'll survive.

I got suckered into working but told them i could only stay till 10:30, got out of there around 10:45, raced home because i forgot my ID, and headed over to shanks.
Everyone was still there just playing video games and sitting around. We left and went to Cowboys. Got drunk really fast which was awesome. I was totally the 5th wheel because sabrina, tara, and lindsey left, so it was just me, catherine, matt, dave and amanda. Which worked out kinda nicely, all the more guys for me! Ended up dancing with 3 different guys, the first one i didn't even see his face, but apparently he was kinda cute. the second one was kinda preppy but still cute we danced for quite a while, until the country came back on and he couldn't dance to country. I danced with the last guy for the majority of the night, and he even attempted to slow dance country style a couple of times which was cool. He is 21 and his name is ron, but i couldn't tell if it was the dancefloor that smelled or just him...

I really have to learn to shut up when i'm drunk, i say the stupidest things that have no relevant point whatsoever, i don't blame you guys if you just tune me out whenever i start to talk.

I'm proud to say that even though i got home at 2:30ish i still made it to my 8:30 class, sure i slept in until 8, didn't have time to have a shower, i reek like smoke, and i look like crap, but i still made it!

Only in calgary can we go from being able to wear shorts and a tank top one day to haveing to wear a scarf and a winter coat the next day. There's a heavy snowfall warning in effect which is totally gross, its April not January. Some guy is waxing all the hair on his body right now on Vibe 98.5 for front row 50 cent tickets, he's gotta be crazy, its just 50 cent, and its all the hair on his body.

!!GO FLAMES!!

We won!!!! We won!!!! We won!!!!
I wish i had tickets to a game
Maybe i'll buy a jersey....

Worked in the bar tonight, didn't sell anything, was actually a pretty fun night

Worked last night...hung out with lindsey, sabrina, catherine and matt after, watched some interesting "videos" havn't laughed that hard in a long time guys...some of that stuff i never ever want to see again.
I wrote my final math midterm on eculdean n space, and i think i failed one of the hardest tests so far this year well asides from calculus but thats a different story.
I get to work again tonight...
going out for catherines bday tomorrow night, i think the plan is shanks then cowboys, i'm excited, its the last chance to get drunk before finals so i'm going to take advantage of it.

You can't pretend things are normal, don't even try, sure be all nice and whatnot but i see right through it. I can pretend that i still don't care , and sure there may be some logic in what you said, but it still doesn't make sense, everything doesn't add up. I've had lots of time to think about stuff, and you know thats a bad thing.

MMM CHOCOLATE!

Easter bunny came this morning and i got a ton of chocolate, haha i can feel my eczeama breaking out already.

Work was shitty last night, various reasons, i just can't deal with people sometimes...
Went to Banff during the day, it was so nice out, but i got burned in the hot springs (which arn't really hot springs anymore cuz they dried up and now they're using municipal water). Went out for lunch on the roof top patio at the rose and crown which was pretty cool...didn't leave till 4:45, had to work at 6, it was pretty close but i got there with 3 minutes to spare.
Doing a family easter dinner in fish creek tonight, should be interesting, eating ham and scalloped potatoes on paper plates, have to work again tonight, and tomorrow ngiht, and the next night...i have an essay due on wednesday and math midterm on tuesday, i have no idea how/when i'm going to study and get them done, plus finals start in just over a week...ahhh

I am totally an emotional eater, when I feel down theres nothing else that I'd rather do then cuddle up with a jumbo box of oreos...however I'm trying to eat healthier, so I only ate half the box...haha well maybe a row, but anyways instead of turning to food I went shopping yesterday, I spent so much money, it felt so good, I went down to TD all by myself, I LOVE that mall, and bought something from almost every store that I went in, the damage for the day was probably around
$250, which isn't too bad, cuz I got a lot of stuff:
- a new khaki jacket
- a cute pink t-shirt
- a hot pair of new jeans
- a black sequined tank top (it's soo pretty)
- two pairs of shoes
- New foundation / eye shadow / mascara
- This cool loofa sponge
- A gigantic bottle of aloe vera lotion (I burnt after only 5 minutes!)

I was walking past mearl norman, and decided i wanted to get my nails done, kinda spontaneous but it felt good. They acutally had an opening for right then which was awesome, had such a good talk with my manicurist, she was so nice, and it wasn't weird small talk we had an actual indepth conversation for the whole hour and fifteen minutes, so she knows my whole life story and everything that happened this last week, plus i have nice nails so it was a nice treat.

Saw a guy almost get hit by a train on the way home, was the scariest thing i've ever seen in my life, everyone on the platform was like omg what should we do? but the train was able to stop in time, we were all so distracted though we didn't realize that it was a whitehorn train, so about 5 of us got on the wrong train and had to backtrack, it's weird how easily you can make friends, we all just laughed about it and talked on the way home.

I hung out with lindsey and dan last night, lindsey and i had an adventure in the superstore parking lot involving shopping carts it was fun stuff.. we went and rented a movie hung out at lindseys house talking about the trip till 3 in the morning which was fun, i'm exhausted now but oh well.

Who wants to go to the bar sometime this weekend? Apparently i need to date other people so i better get started...anyways...i'm skipping 3 of my four classes today to go shopping down at TD, i'm excited, we got paid today which is probably a bad thing, since i'm supposed to be saving money, but oh well i havn't been shopping in forever, well last night, but before that its been months.

I'm going to LA!! it's going to be amazing! hopefully we can get everything worked out so its not super expensive...

I had my last chem lab for four months yesterday, it was awesome we had so much fun, we have the best lab session, we're all friends so its always a good time. I spilt 17M acetic acid on my finger, which is pretty strong, considering that vinegar is only like 5%, it hurt, and then i was stupid and smelt it, wow that burns, you think i'd have learned somtehing after all of these years of chem labs, waft, don't smell, but nope it smelt llike vinegar, it totally burned my nose, couldn't see for a couple of seconds, it was great.
I have to work friday,saturday,sunday,monday and tuesday nights which is a lot, but its money so i'm not going to complain.
I think i might go to the mall this morning, after i work out, havn't been in such a long time, i want summer clothes!

I NEED to go to LA. I have my heart set on going now, there's just the parents left to convince. My mom really really doesn't want me to go, she's just worried, her excuse is that there are lots of serial killers down there, her suggestion was to go all inclusive to mexico, but i want to go to LA. Plus the roadtrip will be amazing, so much fun, and it won't be expensive either 600 bucks top is what i think, i have just over a month left to convince them, i'm sure i can wear them down. Plus i'm 19, i can make my own decisions, both of my parents were living on their own by the time they were 18 so they can't talk, that is until they threaten to take away the car or not pay for school...

I'm a chicken
and its a good thing.
I was planning on being assertive and just do what i thought was best, but then i realized that it was totally the wrong time, that i didn't actually want to do it, and that we needed to have an actual talk before anything happens.

4 days down 1 day to go, i hate working all weekend, it wasn't that bad but i just wanted to go out and do something.

Yay for daylight savings! i love it when you go out at like 9:00 and its just starting to get dark out, and its still warm!

I found out with this snake study thing i'm doing that i'm actually going to have to be touching the snakes, and stretching them out to measure them. I really really don't like snakes. oh well it'll be good for me, plus its super pretty down there, so it'll be nice spending time down there this summer.

arg i just don't want to deal with any of this crap anymore...at all. like seriously things can't work both ways, you may think they can but they can't. It's almost like a game right now, see who gives in first...i promised myself i wouldn't, but i don't think i can handle much more, its too hard, i need to feel important, have a little bit of priority, but there's none of that at all.

Work last night was fun, way better then thursday...thursday night sucked. You wouldn't think it but i'm actually a very social person, and on thursday night the only person that was working was shawn, so i had really no one to talk to, i finished all my crap early in the night, so the rest of the night sucked. and i even contemplated quitting. but Friday night was fun, a ton of people were working and we had a good time...except for when i poured the hot oil from the popper on my hand, that hurt a little...you shoulda seen me bolt for the sink, of course it was during the middle of a rush, i think the guests thought i was crazy...y. We haave this really cool burn spray its like liquid frostish stuff, it hurts but it works so good...they put a bunch of burn cream on it, and wrapped it with gauze so i wouldn't get the creme all over the place, so it looked way worse then it actually was, it's just a little red right now thats all.
Went to amanda's after work which was fun. All the guys were either playing pool, playing nintendo, or playing soccer in the basement, so us girls just sat around upstairs and had some interesting conversations. It was a good time.

Last night was so much fun...
I met up with tim and all of his friends at grandin, saw all the band people practicing in the gym.
The first half of the play was really good, i couldn't tell you about the second half cuz i left during intermission.
I met up with mike and paul at FLC to work out and attempt to teach me how to play squash...it was interesting...i'm sure i'll get the hang of it sooner or later. We ended up talking in the parking lot later for almost an hour, it was nice, its weird how everything seems exaclty the same as it was last year, considering i've probably only seen these people 12 times the whole time we've been in school, but nothing has changed...which is good, because i don't like change.

I have to work the next five days in a row which totally sucks, i have no life.
But only 12 days of school left!

time for physics :( shoot me now....